Champagne of Beers
Angie and I take turns taking care of each other. Friday was my turn to play sober sister...which I do terribly well drunk. She has this funny habit of not admitting that she's wasted - so I've developed (a wholly useless) system to test our level of intoxication.
"On a scale of 1-10, ten being the most drunk, what are you?"
She's always a 3 or 4.
Four strong vodka tonics later, she's still a 4.
We poll the bartender, who says she's a 7.5. She yells at him that he's lying and orders another drink - which he serves with water. Bartenders know most Asians can't hold their shit. Especially when they start hitting people and swearing a lot - a true sign that Angie is sailing smoothly past 5 on the drunk scale.
We try to convice Robin that she needs more beer, but she can't be persuaded. Then Angie smacks her to drive home the point. My eyebrows go up a notch and I start thinking of cutting the lush off...I try to drink her vodka tonic myself, but it's really strong and I hate tonic water.
She narrowly escapes hitting a pole on the walk home - I pulled her to safety at the last minute. She doesn't notice.
Bart train ride was uneventful - except for the throwing up. No, people, I don't know that drunk ass chick next to me with her leg draped over me and a paper bag under her chin.
We get home with the help of Oakland's Quick Cab Company and I tuck her into my bed - trashcan by her head.
Then I'm feeling kind of sober, so I drink some wine on top of the 6 or 7 beers and pass out on the couch.
She wakes up in my Miller High Life tee shirt - yes, I thought it was funny too - and we recap the night while sunbathing on the porch. Not too many places you can work on your tan in the first week of December - but my porch, Oakland, CA is most awesomely one of them.
It's ok - the last time one of us puked, it was me and she did me well.
Please let there never be a time when the two of us are disasters together.
However, if that does happen, we know Robin has our back.
PS: There are pictures, but I'm waiting for Angie to send them to me so I can post them (hint).
"On a scale of 1-10, ten being the most drunk, what are you?"
She's always a 3 or 4.
Four strong vodka tonics later, she's still a 4.
We poll the bartender, who says she's a 7.5. She yells at him that he's lying and orders another drink - which he serves with water. Bartenders know most Asians can't hold their shit. Especially when they start hitting people and swearing a lot - a true sign that Angie is sailing smoothly past 5 on the drunk scale.
We try to convice Robin that she needs more beer, but she can't be persuaded. Then Angie smacks her to drive home the point. My eyebrows go up a notch and I start thinking of cutting the lush off...I try to drink her vodka tonic myself, but it's really strong and I hate tonic water.
She narrowly escapes hitting a pole on the walk home - I pulled her to safety at the last minute. She doesn't notice.
Bart train ride was uneventful - except for the throwing up. No, people, I don't know that drunk ass chick next to me with her leg draped over me and a paper bag under her chin.
We get home with the help of Oakland's Quick Cab Company and I tuck her into my bed - trashcan by her head.
Then I'm feeling kind of sober, so I drink some wine on top of the 6 or 7 beers and pass out on the couch.
She wakes up in my Miller High Life tee shirt - yes, I thought it was funny too - and we recap the night while sunbathing on the porch. Not too many places you can work on your tan in the first week of December - but my porch, Oakland, CA is most awesomely one of them.
It's ok - the last time one of us puked, it was me and she did me well.
Please let there never be a time when the two of us are disasters together.
However, if that does happen, we know Robin has our back.
PS: There are pictures, but I'm waiting for Angie to send them to me so I can post them (hint).
posted by Black Sheep Girl at 11:01 PM
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