Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire
Christmas Eve, 2008. Amazing!
I guess I just never really thought that it would be Christmas this way. I read about the impending depression in the SF Chronicle while sipping my tea (yes, I've given up coffee) and am making homemade gifts since I'm unemployed. I think it's interesting to note that the depression (and, yes, I'm making it a point to call it that 6 months earlier than the standard news outlets) has yet to hit the rest of my family in quite the same way as it has me. Granted, I'm the only one without a job. But at least my cousin and my parents are privy to what is happening in the world around them. I'm terrified for my sister and brother-in-law. No one has let them know that they are not in England in 2007 anymore. They're smart enough. They'll adapt.
More to the point. Marriage. Settling down. Babies. There has been a lot of this as of late. And I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. On the one hand, I'm perfectly capable of celebrating all of the above with perfect social tact. On the other, however, I'm shaking in my boots. And I'm struggling to understand where my non-stereotypical ass falls into the standard early 30's life crisis bullshit. Because I don't want to settle down right now. And I don't hear my maternal clock ticking or whatever the fuck it is.
But I do note that my sister and my mother and my married friends all asking the same questions. "Who are you dating?" (No one.) "What are you doing with your life?" (Nothing, yet.) "Let's talk about your relationships!" (No, thanks.)
And I w0nder, my friends. Will I be subject to these questions from now until the fateful day when I announce my wedding? Will all of my settled acquaintances continue to ask when I'll be catching up to them?
If so, I don't know if I can handle it. How sad does it sound to say that I'm existing happily by a pretty awesome thread of independence, but that this is being challenged by the very women who make me who I am today? What is it about married women than turns them into bad friends who ask too many loaded questions? Do I really have to look forward to endless inquiries about my love life for the next 10+ years while I attend baby showers and weddings? Fucking kill me now.
But I am getting all too bah-humbug for Christmas Eve. I'm going to be an Auntie in 9 months and perhaps I'll actually have a job to match the title. I love my family and I pretty much can't complain about my life. So let's see if I can rise above and bullshit my way through the next decade.
Merry Christmas, people. Feliz Navidad. And whatnot.
I guess I just never really thought that it would be Christmas this way. I read about the impending depression in the SF Chronicle while sipping my tea (yes, I've given up coffee) and am making homemade gifts since I'm unemployed. I think it's interesting to note that the depression (and, yes, I'm making it a point to call it that 6 months earlier than the standard news outlets) has yet to hit the rest of my family in quite the same way as it has me. Granted, I'm the only one without a job. But at least my cousin and my parents are privy to what is happening in the world around them. I'm terrified for my sister and brother-in-law. No one has let them know that they are not in England in 2007 anymore. They're smart enough. They'll adapt.
More to the point. Marriage. Settling down. Babies. There has been a lot of this as of late. And I'm not quite sure how to deal with it. On the one hand, I'm perfectly capable of celebrating all of the above with perfect social tact. On the other, however, I'm shaking in my boots. And I'm struggling to understand where my non-stereotypical ass falls into the standard early 30's life crisis bullshit. Because I don't want to settle down right now. And I don't hear my maternal clock ticking or whatever the fuck it is.
But I do note that my sister and my mother and my married friends all asking the same questions. "Who are you dating?" (No one.) "What are you doing with your life?" (Nothing, yet.) "Let's talk about your relationships!" (No, thanks.)
And I w0nder, my friends. Will I be subject to these questions from now until the fateful day when I announce my wedding? Will all of my settled acquaintances continue to ask when I'll be catching up to them?
If so, I don't know if I can handle it. How sad does it sound to say that I'm existing happily by a pretty awesome thread of independence, but that this is being challenged by the very women who make me who I am today? What is it about married women than turns them into bad friends who ask too many loaded questions? Do I really have to look forward to endless inquiries about my love life for the next 10+ years while I attend baby showers and weddings? Fucking kill me now.
But I am getting all too bah-humbug for Christmas Eve. I'm going to be an Auntie in 9 months and perhaps I'll actually have a job to match the title. I love my family and I pretty much can't complain about my life. So let's see if I can rise above and bullshit my way through the next decade.
Merry Christmas, people. Feliz Navidad. And whatnot.
posted by Black Sheep Girl at 12:20 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home